Happy New Year? Well, not really is it?
New Year’s Eve, 2022 was among the most uneventful for me, as I spent the evening watching TV and looking after my wife; who was recovering from a medical procedure. I didn’t mind this, of course. It was far more important to me to look after my partner’s needs and well being than to pretend to enjoy the artificial party atmosphere of the collective excitement at being able to begin anew just because the calendar date has changed.
Not that I was at any time eager to spend vast sums of money to be squashed into a pokey venue with a bunch of ultra-enthusiastic people and be charged extortionate prices for entry and drinks while being assaulted audibly by ear-splittingly-loud music. This type of New Year’s Eve is the commercial attempt to squeeze out the last few pennies from a public eager to believe the hype and to believe that overnight, the failures of the past can be wiped clean and the whole game of life reset.
No. Not this year for me. This year I had the chance to truly reflect on what New Year meant for me; and I have to emphasise that this was not an analysis but more of a broader observation on the whole concept. Specifically I separated the true (to me anyway) meaning of New Year in opposition to the consumer hyped myth.
My wife, as I said before, had undergone a hospital procedure on 30th December. She was going to need a few days to recover, as the general anaesthetic alone can make one feel despondent. She was never going to be in a celebratory mood and it would take beyond New Year’s Eve to get back to her normal self. In other words there was going to be no reset; although there is never a reset. You cannot undo the day before, the week before or any part of the previous year. You cannot undo the successes or failures. You cannot undo the birth of a new life or the death of a loved one. You cannot undo what is done, as if it never happened. But you have a choice to make things better. You have a choice to make more effort. You have a choice to do things differently. You have a choice to do all of these things every day but for some, New Year’s Eve is the chance to upgrade your mindset simply because a number in the calendar changed.
We do similar mini upgrades on our birth day, which is probably no more individual and personal than New Year’s Eve but does not carry with it the hopes and desires of the collective. Hope is the default setting that politicians try to sell but this is a myth designed to keep people passive and dependent on other people to change things for the many. ‘Effort’ would be a much more productive mindset and more likely to lead to the objectives of one’s hopes and wishes.
Back to New Year’s Eve, a time of year when the world, at least the world that follows the Julian calendar, come together to observe the death of the old year and celebrate the birth of a new one. In 2022 we also saw the death of Queen Elizabeth II and the ascension to the throne of King Charles III. The Monarchy continues without pause, for which death is merely a passing of the baton. This passing happens all the time but maybe not so publicly. There is no reset to this change but we have to readjust our life to fill the gaps made by those who have moved on.
In Numerology, the change from 2022, a 6-year, to 2023, a 7-year, will be frustrating to many. The number 7 reflects the striving towards perfection but the camps will be divided between those who believe things should stay as they are (perfect for them) and those who believe change is necessary (not perfect for them). In other words there is likely to be an entrenchment of thought and the need to understand why others think differently? This is a year that is necessary to understand ‘why’? Why is there such a divide? Yes, we all understand our own view but analysis demands that we try to understand the opposing view. 2023 will be a year to decide if we are to mend a bridge or burn it, for which there will be consequences either way for the next year or two.
Some people, and I daresay that extraverts will agree, will consider the party party approach to New Year is a cathartic way to purge one’s self of all previous negative thoughts and start the New Year afresh with hope and optimism; or as in many cases, ringing eardrums and a hangover. Introverts commonly find the whole thing a bit of an ordeal and look forward to the clock chiming 12, lots of handshaking and wishing everyone happy new year and then finding the quickest way home. It won’t surprise you to know that I belong to the latter category. My wife tells me I carry the humbug attitude well beyond Christmas but I find many positives to presenting as a grumpy old git; a portrayal that does not appear to work on my grandchildren, as they can see right through the pretence.
I went to bed before 2023, as I dare say that many others did too. ‘Time’ does not need someone to watch over it; it is a human construct. There are millions of mechanical counters that will continue to keep time while we sleep. The past will not suddenly disappear as the year ends but we are kept so busy following the societal patterns of the year that it almost comes as second nature that we only look to the future when everyone else does. The Roman God, Janus, from which the month of January got its name, had two heads; one looking back and the other looking ahead. The transition of past to future is as constant as time and can be considered at any time of year.
But there is nothing wrong with everyone thinking ahead at the same time. And maybe it can also be a positive energy for the collective unconscious. However, it reminds me of a great cartoon on the internet where the speaker asks ‘Who wants change?’ and everyone raises their hand. He then says, ;Who wants to change?’ and all hands remain down. So as everyone hopes for their individual future, it makes me wonder how that future will emerge if there is no change by anyone from the present?
New Year’s resolutions, a common feature of looking ahead, should really be rebranded as a New Year plan. Rather than concentrate on giving up something like smoking or losing weight, we should be looking at making positive and realistic changes to ourselves of which health - including our mental health - is a bi-product. It is no surprise that would-be ex smokers and weight losers resolutions collapse in less than a month because there was no real plan and no consideration of mindset. The New Year ‘resolve’ has been hijacked with consumerist ‘flummery’ for the benefit of directing you to your next shopping experience. Immediately after boxing day you will see advertisements for holidays and Easter eggs appear in supermarkets. It is a never ending conveyor belt of distraction.
It used to be that in the days when there were candles to light the dark days of winter, people had time to sit, consider and plan the next agricultural year: what to grow? what to leave fallow? what to store? These were things that could only be accomplished at certain times of the year. Some plants needed stratification to grow (like garlic for example). Others needed warmer soil to germinate. The seasons dictated when the work could be done but planning was essential.
So to those who wish for a Happy New Year, there is a choice to be made. Do you make it happen or just hope that others will do it for you? The phrase itself is a great sound bite but impractical. No one is happy for the whole year. Much of 2023 is likely to be filled with a mixed bag of emotions, of which happiness is invariably a fleeting moment. It might be more accurate to amend the statement to one that is achievable and more sincere; I wish you may find happiness in 2023.
Shane Ward is the author of:
“Stop Smoking: Diary of a Quitter”. It is a real time diary that also considers your mindset before and after you quit and some essential conditions in planning to quit.
https://www.amazon.co.uk/Stop-Smoking-Quitter-Shane-Ward/dp/B0BJV2KNYF/ref=tmm_pap_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=&sr=
“Numerology: Making it Work for You”. A fun book that now only gives you an introduction to numerology but also the chance to make it work for you after only two chapters. From the information given you can extrapolate 279 different character types with just a 30 second calculation.
https://www.amazon.co.uk/Numerology-Marking-Work-Shane-Ward/dp/B0BJTJ7G8B/ref=tmm_pap_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=&sr=
Kindle editions also available.
